Turning Twenty-Five

We had been trying to be adults since we
were 15
When we finally reached 18, nothing
changed
It wasn't until we were lying on the
bathroom floor
Drunk and high in two different states
That we realized
Age is just a number
And reality is learning there's no such
thing as being an adult
You only grow older
                    And if you're lucky
                                         Maybe a little wiser

What is it that makes people think it's okay to be lost when you're 24, but once you turn 25 you're going to have to get your shit together. Who makes up that rule? What difference would one year make?

In case anyone cares, I turned 25 earlier this week. And dare I say, I have lived my life to the fullest.

My 24 was one hell of a year. On that year, for the first time, I was forced to be an adult. My mother fell sick. Not just any usual kind of sick. But the kind of sick that affects the whole big family. For the first time, my mom wasn't there to help me decide whatever kind of major decision I had to take in life. She has gotten a lot better now (thank God). But a little too many things have changed, I can't even remember how life used to be before the year 2014.

On the age of 24, I let go of the man I thought I was going to marry for the rest of my life. I ended a five-years relationship just because I wasn't sure with him anymore and the decision is still haunting me till this day.

I have found many new kinds of love along the way. I opened up myself to any kind of possibilities. I accepted any kind of affections I thought I deserved. I had a taste of the forbidden love affair. I even was "the other woman" for a moment there (and then another moment. Look what have become of me, Ma).

I met my so-called soulmate.

I met another version of me.

I met a lot of new, interesting people.

I even reconnected with a long-lost friend... or firstlove. Only to be lost again.

I had more life in one year than I ever had in my previous twenty-three years. So I thought, really, what is it in life that still can surprise me? I shouldn't be worried too much now............ except maybe, the fact that I'm 25 and still just as lost.

Opening poem via Hello Poetry